I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
