my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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