He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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