The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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