It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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