I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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