in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
