Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I believe in your delicious
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Randomize
