Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Randomize
