Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
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