And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize