Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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