Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
