That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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