I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
