He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
