How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
