so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize