so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
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