I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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