Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
