My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
