Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
