You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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