Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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