She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
