TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize
