Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
