i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
