Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I supernannyed him into submission
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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