in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I got inside last night via doggy door
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
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