im gay
i know
yea but for you.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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