drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
