I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
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