Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
How does one acquire holy water?
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
