just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
