i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
