And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize