I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize