is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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