theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
