no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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