Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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