I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
