i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize