peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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