I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
