Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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