Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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