dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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